The Syncreate Podcast: Empowering Creativity
Welcome to Syncreate, where we explore the intersections between creativity, psychology, and spirituality. Our goal is to demystify the creative process and expand the boundaries of what it means to be creative.
Creativity. It’s a word we throw around all the time, but what does it really mean? On the Syncreate Podcast, we share stories of the creative journey. We talk to changemakers, visionaries and everyday creatives working in a wide array of fields and disciplines. Our goal is to explore creativity in all its facets, and to gain a better understanding of the creative process – from imagination to innovation and everything in between.
The Syncreate Podcast is hosted by Melinda Rothouse, PhD. She helps individuals and organizations bring their creative dreams and visions to life through coaching, consulting, workshops, retreats, and now, this podcast. She's written two books on creativity, including Syncreate: A Guide to Navigating the Creative Process for Individuals, Teams, and Communities (winner of a Silver Nautilus Award for Creativity and Innovation), with Charlotte Gullick. She's also a musician (singer-songwriter and bass player) and photographer based in Austin, Texas.
The Syncreate Podcast: Empowering Creativity
Episode 117: Creativity, Anxiety & Authenticity with Amanda Beck, PhD
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This episode explores the connections between anxiety, authenticity, and creativity, including the hidden gifts and messages of anxiety and their implications for personal development. Amanda Beck is an actress, writer, and doctor of humanistic psychology whose work lives at the intersection of creativity, anxiety, and the authentic self. She holds a PhD from Saybrook University with a specialization in Creativity Studies, where her dissertation explored the deep connections between anxiety, authenticity, and creative expression. Amanda’s research reframes anxiety not as a disorder to be eliminated, but as an alchemical signal pointing toward transformation and authentic becoming.
For our Creativity Pro-Tip, we encourage you to explore your relationship to self-trust, authenticity, and creative expression. Sometimes this requires going within and tuning out the noise from the outside world in order to hear and express our own authentic voice.
Credits: The Syncreate podcast is created and hosted by Melinda Rothouse, and produced at Record ATX studios with in collaboration Michael Osborne and 14th Street Studios in Austin, Texas. Syncreate logo design by Dreux Carpenter.
If you enjoy this episode and want to learn more about the creative process in a variety of contexts, you might also like our conversations in Episode 10: Imagination and Creativity with Psychologist and Creativity Coach Dr. Diana Rivera, Episode 103: Trauma, Creativity, and Mental Health with Tracy Sisk, LMHC, and Episode 115: The Power of Play: Creativity, Play, and Embodiment with Dr. Tamara Russell.
At Syncreate, we're here to support your creative endeavors. If you have an idea for a project or a new venture, and you’re not sure how to get it off the ground, find us at syncreate.org. Our book, also called Syncreate, walks you through the stages of the creative process so you can take action on your creative goals. We offer resources, creative process tools, and coaching to help you bring your work to the world. Find and connect with us on social media and YouTube under Syncreate. If you enjoy the show, please subscribe and leave us a review! We’d love to hear your feedback as well, so drop us a line at info@syncreate.org.
Episode-specific hyperlinks:
Book: The War of Art by Steven Pressfield
Essay: The Uses of the Erotic by Audre Lorde (within Sister Outsider)
Show / permanent hyperlinks:
Melinda: Creativity and community are absolutely vital in challenging times. Welcome to Syncreate, a show where we explore the intersections between creativity, psychology and spirituality. We believe everyone has the capacity to create. Our goal is to demystify the process and expand the boundaries of what it means to be creative. We talk with visionaries and changemakers and everyday creatives working in a wide range of fields and media, from the arts to science, technology and business.
We aim to illuminate the creative process, from imagination to innovation and everything in between. I'm Melinda Rothouse, and I help individuals and organizations bring their dreams and visions to life. At Syncreate, we're here to support your creative endeavors. If you have an idea for a project or new venture, but you're not quite sure how to get it off the ground, find us at syncreate.org.
Our book, also called Syncreate, available in both print and audio format, walks you through the stages of the creative process so you can take action on your creative goals. We also offer resources, creative process tools, and coaching to help you bring your work to the world.
My guest today is Amanda Beck, Ph.D. She's an actress, writer, and doctor of humanistic psychology whose work lives at the intersection of creativity, anxiety and the authentic self.
She holds a Ph.D. from Saybrook University with a specialization in creativity studies, where her dissertation, The Magic of Anxiety: The Alchemical, Transpersonal Process of Realizing the Authentic, Creative Self, explored the deep connections between anxiety, authenticity, and creative expression through heuristic self-search inquiry. Amanda's research reframes anxiety not as a disorder to be eliminated, but as an alchemical signal pointing toward transformation and authentic becoming.
As an actress based in Los Angeles, she brings her psychological research directly into her artistic practice and storytelling. Welcome, Amanda. So great to have you on the show today.
Amanda: Yeah, thank you so much for having me. I'm excited to be here.
Melinda: Me too. And just to share a little bit about how we know each other… So you just finished your Ph.D. at Saybrook University, where I also teach, and I had the honor of chairing your dissertation committee, which was a lovely process, and we've collaborated together in various different ways over the years now. And you've even helped me with some things on the show. So welcome to the other side of the screen or the recording, as it were!
Amanda: It’s so great to be, so cool to be on the other side!
Melinda: Yeah, yeah. So I'm really excited that we could do this. And congratulations once again on getting your Ph.D. And so your research focuses on kind of the relationship between anxiety and authenticity via creative process. And so can you just maybe share a little bit about the research itself, kind of how you decided to focus on this topic and what you learned?
Amanda: Yeah, absolutely. And thank you. I… this is a very personal topic for me. So I came to Saybrook really interested in researching something to do with anxiety and the connection between that and creativity because I've had a lot of anxiety my whole life. I've really had, really struggled with panic attacks. Was diagnosed generalized anxiety disorder and panic disorder. And I just knew that what I was being told wasn't, like, the full story.
I knew that there seemed to be a connection also to when I would have periods of great anxiety and panic attacks, and moments, just times of profound transformation in my life. And I started to piece together things and I was just like, there's got to be something different than this really, kind of depressing, clinical, like, label and story that had been told to me and really kind of more so made me not trust myself.
So I just, I felt that there was a different way. And so that's kind of how I came into the school and how I came into the research. And there was a lot that blossomed out from that.
Melinda: Yeah. So, I mean, there's so much to talk about, but kind of even further back, like what inspired you to get a Ph.D. in the first place?
Amanda: Well, I didn't actually know that I would get a Ph.D. I had always kind of wanted to do my master's in psychology. And being an actor- And this whole process happened as I was transitioning to California from, I lived in Florida my whole life. So I was, like, moving at the time I was starting grad school.
And it kind of started out as a good transition for me to make the move out here. And, but, yeah, I had always wanted to, I had always been interested in getting a master's in psychology, but I had looked up programs that would maybe connect, like, psychology and acting, and there really just wasn't anything out there.
So, this program at Saybrook was the closest thing, having psychology with a creativity studies specialization. And then I just kept going from there because once that finished, it just, I was like, I guess I'm not done!
Melinda: Yeah, one thing leads to another, right? I think that's so true. So, you talked about kind of what drew you to this topic and this research coming from your deep personal experience.
And so for our listeners and viewers who might not know that much about this kind of qualitative research or this type of heuristic inquiry process, tell us kind of how you went about it and kind of what were some of your main findings?
Amanda: Yeah, absolutely. So this type of research called heuristic self-search inquiry, it was born out of a method called heuristic inquiry. And actually, someone from our school, Sandy Sela-Smith, she believed that this method- it's already a method that is really wonderful and intuitive, and allows the process of research to be non-linear and creative. And originally, that method, you use other researchers, they call them co-researchers.
So, Sandy, Dr. Sela-Smith, she thought that there was a lot missing from your own personal, as a researcher, people going in and really using their own experience, which can be really counterintuitive, as we've discussed in the academic world, it can be really counterintuitive to really go deep in your own subjective experience. But that's kind of, that was originated at our, at Saybrook, at our school. So that was really interesting.
And what I did, we actually together set some parameters. And it was a two-week, we called it like a personal retreat, where I just focused on my research question every day. I meditated, I journaled, I took voice notes, I had a creative journal. And I also had to do one creative activity each day. And that was anything from working on my writing, my book, or going to a painting class or going to dance. Ironically, I don't think I did much acting during that time, but most of the other time I’m doing that.
But, yeah. So it was, and it was just recording transpersonal insights from dreams, or visions, meditations, things like that, neuroceptive insights, things that I really focused on my body and how it was feeling, because I think the somatic part of that is such a big part of anxiety.
And, yeah, just any other insights that arose, kept track on a log, and a written and creative journal, and voice memos.
Melinda: Yeah, yeah. So what did you learn about yourself and your experience of anxiety as it relates to creativity and authenticity?
Amanda: I learned so much. It confirmed a lot that I had already intuitively felt. But seeing it all come together in the research process was really fascinating because I think that there's so much- I think everyone should do it. I think everyone should go through the process, even informally, which I had kind of been doing some of that informally. And even just taking, once I got the transcripts and taken the documents and put them all together, and then I would take out, I had, I don't know, I had like 235, something like that, sticky notes that I just took.
And then putting those into categories was really, really interesting because we just play out these patterns so much. And so to really realize what's going on in the unconscious was really fascinating. So it confirmed a lot for me, and I learned, it really did solidify for me that anxiety, it's not, in my experience, it's not this pathological thing, that it really is connected to transformation.
There was a lot of, actually the biggest finding I had, which was kind of… it made sense, but it was just surprising to me was, the largest category was about having, like, a boundary or a container so that my authentic self could come through. And how that relates to anxiety is that, a lot of times, you're told not to trust yourself and you’re, you don't feel safe. So it's like, when I actually would listen to my anxiety as my authentic self just being, speaking louder and, like, trying to get through, that would be able to contribute to this safe space and this container that I needed to have my authentic self come through.
And how it relates to creativity is, I was saying throughout my research that my kind of theory on how they all connect is that anxiety is repressed or suppressed authenticity, and creativity is expressed authenticity. And I do, I think I feel my most myself when I am creating. So, yeah, that's kind of a lot, but.
Melinda: Yeah. Yeah. Beautiful. And I know you've been exploring this theme in different ways, you're also working on a novel that you've been working on for a while now. And just kind of coming into the research process, this sense you had that, those times when you felt the most anxiety in your life, and correct me if I'm not, like, framing this correctly, but, that, when you felt like you couldn't be your authentic self, and that, like, created anxiety. Or, you know, we get all these signals from the outside world about who we’re supposed to be, or how we're supposed to show up, or how we're supposed to behave. And that can, if it feels, like, at odds with how we truly are, then that can create that internal tension that can be experienced as anxiety. Right?
Amanda: Yeah.
Melinda: And I think probably a lot of people experience that. But maybe never could quite put a finger on it in the way that you have.
Amanda: Yeah. That's a great way of putting it. Absolutely. I think there's a lot of… I think through this research I really understood why I'm so into dystopian novels, because- (Laughter)
Melinda: (Laughter) Yeah!
Amanda: It's like this, it's this society and this conformity, it's like working against the authentic self. And even a lot of mainstream psychology, I feel like there's a long way to go with, at least my experience as a client or a patient.
And this is why I was, I keep saying that, I wish in a therapist office, someone had treated me like, you’re, like Harry Potter, like you're a wizard! Of course, there's things you don't know how to, you have to go to wizard school to manage this gift you have. Not that it's like, oh, you can't trust your thoughts, and we have to medicate you, and you know. And not that that's never appropriate. But it's just that that was never explained to me in that way.
So, I do think there's a lot of, you know… And another thing I was, as I was looking back on the research, one of the things I had written about is these affirmations that I would notice, in a class, I would be really nervous to speak, to ask a question, and to speak in front of people.
And when I told myself, I am, I'm safe, that didn't necessarily just calm me down, but when I said I'm enough, like it would immediately. So I think that’s related to, oh, like, I can be my authentic self, like, I'm enough. Like, I can be, it’s safe to be seen. So, I'm connecting those dots more and more.
Melinda: Yeah. Beautiful. Beautiful. And I think this is such an empowering message. Right? Because anxiety can be, of course, debilitating for many, many people. And, you know, instead of, as you said, being told, like, oh, you can't trust your thoughts, or don't pay attention to those thoughts, or you need medication, or whatever. This is a process, basically, that anyone could use.
It's kind of self-empowering to say, well, how could I use creativity as a pathway toward working with my anxiety and finding my way toward greater authenticity, authentic expression, like, confidence to show up as I am?
Amanda: Yeah, yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. I think getting to be, also being an artist to me, more and more I realize it's like, this is all the same conversation.
It is entirely about being your authentic self and the anxiety that can come up with, because society's not always supportive of someone who is an artist and being able to, one, just speak their truth, but two, also support themselves, as that, as a lifestyle and as a career and as what they contribute.
Melinda: Definitely, definitely. So that makes me think, now that you've completed this research, you know, well, first of all, how do you put these findings, what you learned from your research, into practice? Like if you go into, say, an audition, or what, a situation in your life, whatever it might be, where you feel anxiety coming on, like, how do you, do you have certain techniques that you've developed, like as a, kind of insights from this research that you now use or that come into your mind when you're in a potentially stressful situation?
Amanda: Yeah, that's a great question, and I am absolutely still figuring it out. I'm still learning, myself, all the time. But it does help to look back on the research and I think the bounce back rate is getting quicker because it is things I remember. I think that when I'm experiencing anxiety, it just, if I can remember that, wait, this is, it just, it helps so much to reframe it. Like that's a huge thing.
I think the way, when we change the way we see something and respond to it, we change our experience of it. So, you know, and it's just, it's happening right now. There's a transition period out of school and it's, I'm in this very liminal space and it's very strange. And I keep, I think the metaphors help, imageries help, of like, a baby in the womb, you know, you're surrounded by darkness and it's divine.
And it's part of the process before something, this transformation happens, before something's birthed. Or, you know, a seed under the, there's a quote that I always loved. And it was, when you think you've been buried but you've actually been planted, something like that.
Melinda: Yes. Yes.
Amanda: Yeah. So that, those kind of things, or like a diamond forming under intense heat and pressure, when I remember like, okay, this is not fun, but then I'm like, wait, this is just, you know, the part before the great transformation happens. That helps. That really helps to, and just surrendering to some of it and being like, okay, this is what's happening right now. And yeah.
Melinda: Yeah, I think that's helpful for all of us just remembering that we're in a process, that whatever is happening in this moment is part of a larger process. It's not always going to feel like it feels right now, especially if it's, you know, a challenging experience or whatever.
But I was also thinking of this other quote that you included in your dissertation from Joseph Campbell, right. The cave you fear to enter contains the treasure you seek. And so there's this idea that it may be uncomfortable, but the transformation or the alchemical process, as you talked about it in your dissertation, involves like sort of pushing out of that comfort zone to explore these deeper parts of ourselves, where there is treasure, there is insight, there are possibilities there.
Amanda: Yeah, yeah. And it makes me think too, of, I've been thinking a lot about resistance lately, because, I think it's different than anxiety, but it's in similar territory, I think it really, the moments of greatest resistance. And I think it's, is it in The War of Art? It's Steven Pressfield that says, you've got to do the thing that you are resisting the most?
And you go, kind of go, oh crap, like (Laughter). It's like, you’re like, oh, okay. But it really helps me to reframe that. And I think of, I always think of, like, a slingshot, of like, the more you're pulled back and you feel so much resistance, then you're going to be catapulted, slingshot forward and, yeah.
So it's just a reframe, because when you experience the fear or the anxiety and you're like, this is awful, this is so scary. But when you see it for what it is, you kind of, yeah. You see it's not actually meant to, put in your path to destroy or harm you. It's meant to help you get to the next level.
Melinda: Yeah, definitely. So, with this type of self-search inquiry, this kind of research, since you essentially, the researcher, are your own research subject, you're exploring deeply your own experience, it can't necessarily be generalized to a broader population. However, I think with these insights that you've uncovered, there is potentially something here that can be valuable to others.
And of course, I'm encouraging, you know, a book and other things to develop from this research. But how do you feel like these insights could be of benefit to the wider world? Like what might that look like?
Amanda: Yeah. Well, it's making me think of something one of my wonderful musician friends said once, Liddy Clark, she said, there's universality in the specificity, I think she said. And it's like her music she writes that's very, it's very specific. It's like, very personal from her own experience. But you relate to it. I feel like it's kind of like the, you know, niching down in business.
It's like if you're, you know, when you're speaking really specifically about something, you know, people find treasure in there of their own. And so I think that's what I want to do and what I wanted to do in this research and through any kind of art or storytelling is just hold a mirror, just to let people find their own treasure, not to force any ideas.
But I think that when people will share their stories and their experiences, sometimes you go, oh, I hadn't thought of it that way. And that's how, you know, things have helped me a lot. So, does that kind of makes sense?
Melinda: Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. And what it's sparking for me, as you were speaking, I was kind of starting to think about, you know, just in this world that we're living in, in this particular moment in time with all the technology and all the media and all the onslaught of information that we're constantly bombarded with all the time, there is a great value in going inward and reflecting on our own experience and coming to know ourselves on a deeper level.
And I think it's, again, a very empowering message that the answers aren't always out there. So often, in fact, they're, they come from within, right?
Amanda: Yeah. Absolutely.
Melinda: And we don't need a therapist or a psychiatrist or a medical doctor to tell us, you know. Those things can be helpful, of course, and are necessary in many cases. But we also have tools, or we can develop tools within ourselves, which is the most, I think, beneficial of all in certain ways, because we can do it on our own at any time, wherever we are, you know.
Amanda: Yeah. Well, and that's the great thing about creativity and why, and I included your Syncreate in my research. It's such a, I read a quote recently, I don't know where it came from, but it was something about that creativity is, you know, it's a rebellious, you know-
Melinda: Yes.
Amanda: -act. It's, cause you can sit down anywhere and write a story or even just daydreaming something, or putting something, making an art- this is not my, art, visual art’s not my medium- but you can do a painting. You can do that from anywhere.
And I do feel like there's a reason why there's banned books, because there's power. There's a lot of power in art. And I also, as you know, as a means for anxiety, when I remember to go into my fictional world of things and it makes it better, because I'm, it creates a psychological distance, I think, for you to process. So I think that's also why fantasy and myth, all those things are really, appealing to us. You know, stories are really, really important for our mental health.
Melinda: Definitely, definitely. I mean, I experienced this last night. You know I'm a part of this songwriting group, and we have a deadline coming up, and I'm working on a song, and I was kind of, like, tired. And the day was long and there were, you know, blahdy-blah.
And I was like, well, I kind of just want to take it easy and go to bed, but I need to work on this song. So I got out my little keyboard, and I was working on my song, and I actually made good progress on getting to play the song all the way through and sing it and record it.
And, I always find that no matter what is going on in my day, when I begin to engage in a creative practice, and part of it is just making time, just like, I'm going to do this, whatever it is, you know, making a painting or just playing with creative materials, whatever it is or music or whatever, it literally takes you into a different brain state.
And often into a flow state, where you're activating different neural pathways in the brain and kind of turning off the left brain, linear, to-do list, oh, got to do all these things. And that's stressful and overwhelming. And like, you're kind of coming more into this right brain, although we know it's more holistic than that. But this space of flow and this space of creativity, and it can shift your entire mental state, quickly.
Amanda: Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. And I really, I'm an advocate for people living their life that way. You know, like, being the artist of your life as well. Cause it's like this, creativity is, you know, it's erotic. It's the life force of everything, how we come into being, that's all of it is, you know, creative. So, I'm definitely an advocate for that.
Melinda: Yeah, absolutely. And, so kind of speaking of that part, obviously, you are an actor as well in Los Angeles and kind of, you know, have your budding acting career, as you've finished your PhD here. So, like, how do you take some of these insights into your acting experiences?
Amanda: Yeah, that's a great question. And one I need to sit more with because the performance anxiety is still very real.
Melinda: Yeah.
Amanda: But it is very, very cool to, acting specifically to, it's something I've been thinking a lot about is, in my acting, it seems probably counterintuitive to maybe non-actors. But to find my most authentic self and my most authentic version of this character.
I kind of was recently, been thinking about it, because there's a lot and you learn a lot in acting school and just being analytical. And again, all these tools are helpful, but it's like at the end of the day, it just feels like, where do me and the character merge because that's the place, that's always the place I want to make art from.
And I think it also speaks to the connection between anxiety, authenticity, and creativity. Because when, more lately, I've been able to engage in this space of just existing and living in the space and trusting myself. I mean, all this is about self-trust, too.
You have your prep and then you let it go, to be the most authentic. And it's just, the thing that my perfectionist self doesn't like, but it's actually really enjoyable, is that it just, you can't fully plan, you can have your, okay, you walk here at this point and you, your character, feels this way about this person.
But it's like, the exact moments, there's so much gold in just letting it live authentically in the moment. So, but I'm definitely like, that's something I'm really exploring with the performance anxiety. And it feels more and more like my acting's getting more transpersonal, more, I'm starting to study like, dreamwork for actors, and yeah. I think there's, I don't know if that fully answers your question, I'm still figuring it out.
Melinda: Yeah, it strikes me also because acting is such an embodied experience, right? You're not just saying lines, you're embodying a character and their physical expression. We know that in regular everyday communication, it's 70% at least non-verbal, not just the words that are being said, but the tone and the gestures and the facial expressions and how we are holding ourselves.
And there's so much information conveyed non-verbally. And that, of course, is true in acting as well. And when you're portraying a character, of course you want to be able to imagine and understand that character's basic motivations, right. And questions of anxiety and authenticity are, I think, fundamental motivations in human experience. Of course, there are others, many others as well.
But like studying psychology, you are studying kind of the human condition, right? And what are these basic emotions and what are these basic drivers and what motivates a person or a character to make this choice versus that choice and so on, right?
Amanda: Yeah. Totally. Totally. And there's so much psychology in like, all the basic acting training and all the teachers that go back to the beginning. And the somatic piece of it, the body, I'm so glad you brought up the embodied piece of it.
Because one thing that I really did get into with this research was polyvagal theory. I'm collecting my books, and I'm going more into that now. But there's a concept called neuroception, and the way that I understand it-I'm simplifying it, but I think it's the way that your body gets cues from your internal organs, what's happening there, it gets cues from the outside environment, like maybe the look of your, somebody's face, the tone of their voice.
And it's something that meant a lot to me to learn. Because I would say so much, where so much therapy, they're like, just change your thoughts. And I'm like, but I swear I wasn't worrying. There's times I worry, but there's times where I'm like, I wasn't thinking, but it’s like my body knew first. So that really validated it for me.
And as an actor, again, in some of my papers earlier on, I was exploring some of the different acting techniques, and I remember a lot of the westernized version of acting were more of a slippery slope with … And, you know, our good friend Whitney Ann Jenkins that just did her dissertation on blurred boundaries.
There's so much of that that happens when you get confused about psychologically, like emotionally, whether it's the other person or just your own personal, like, you have to be super depressed or, you know, so.
Melinda: Like just to clarify, like blurring between, like, when you're an actor portraying a character, I mean, there's different kinds of blurred boundaries, which Whitney's dissertation is exploring kind of the idea of showmance and things like that.
But even within a single actor portraying a character, there's blurred boundaries between like, is this me? Or this is the character? And we hear these stories, of course, about actors who got so deep into their method acting that it was then difficult for them to come out of it after the film or the show or whatever was over.
Amanda: Yeah, absolutely. So it's, and some of the methods are, they just, yeah. I think it can just be a slippery slope. It doesn't have to be dangerous, but it can be, and so that's why it's like, and thank you for clarifying that. I think a lot of the more eastern practices I was reading about that use the body, that was, in the research it was saying that there was, that was psychologically safer, more healthy.
Melinda: Yes.
Amanda: I think it's true, the more I get into it. And it's just like when you listen to your, and get out of your head. And even that's what I'm learning about trauma is. Trauma is, it's also the way we're holding on to a story, rather than just what happens, and then we can let it go. If you can let it go, it's not so much the problem.
And I just wanted to say one other thing about that, which is, I've been taking some various classes in Los Angeles, and I just did one with this really wonderful instructor Patrick Day, and he, and it was the first class, and he had us do a meditation and, before we did any acting. And I was like, I don't know, a lot of acting classes I've been in are, you know, we do things to get energized. And people are like, anxiety is good for it. I'm like, are you sure, because I already have a lot of it. And it's just, if it's too much where you can't control it.
And we did that meditation and sensory exercises and something just dropped in me, I felt this relaxed. And I was like, oh, that's where my authentic self is. That's where I create from. So I think it also transcends into that, of that maybe performance anxiety is also a sign of like, I'm not authentically in the character.
Melinda: Or it strikes me, there's an element of grounding also, because meditation can be very grounding, like we're grounding in our body, grounding in our present moment experience.
Amanda: Yes.
Melinda: And then we can express from that place. Yeah.
Amanda: Totally.
Melinda: Yeah, yeah. Great. So, what's next for you in your creative journey, both academically and professionally?
Amanda: It's a good question. I'm definitely figuring it out every day, but, yeah. Acting, I'm getting ready for a performance in June. It's just going to be a showcase. We're getting that together, and then I'm excited to give my book more the attention it deserves, because that's been with me for a long time and explores a lot of these same concepts, just fictionally.
So having the dissertation being done now, I can focus more on the creative stuff and hopefully, yeah, more research. And,I definitely do plan on continuing to adapt my dissertation into a book and I just hope a lot more freedom creatively. I hope that this, you asked about getting a PhD before and it wasn't something I had totally knew I was going to do.
But I think I have often thought of, and I'm sure you can attest to this because of all that you do, that being a researcher is also one of the most creative things you can do and to make a difference, because you get to decide what things in the world you want to understand more and then go find answers to it and then have evidence-based information that you can do something with and you can create change with, and is another way for people to, it's just another form. I really think it's just another form, another audience. Just the same as, you know, art making is.
Melinda: Absolutely, absolutely. Well, I'm excited to see where this journey takes you. And as you know well, I like to end each episode with a Creativity Pro-Tip, something people can try out on their own. And so I'm curious, maybe from your research, is there a particular tip or technique or tool that you find particularly helpful, say, when experiencing performance anxiety or working with stressful situations that could be helpful for people?
Amanda: Yes, there is, I really just, I feel really, really strongly about the self-trust piece. And I think that can look different to different people. But I really feel that, whether it is a performance or something that you're just creating alone in your room, I really, I really feel that if there is some sort of way you can block out the noise, of anything that others have said and whether that's through meditation or just listening to your desire and your inner child, and this erotic-creative life force.
One of my favorite authors is Audre Lorde. And she talks about in her essay The Uses of the Erotic, just read that essay!
Melinda: Yeah! We’ll put it in the show notes for sure. Yeah.
Amanda: Yeah, I have so many quotes of hers that I'm just like, yes! You know? That thing that you're giving yourself permission to feel what you want to feel and explore what you want to explore, even if it feels taboo or you've been told it's wrong.
Like, I really just think that so much of mental health in general and struggles for artists comes from this repression or suppression of something. So if there's a way that you can explore that and express it, then I think that's the way to integrate everything into your, you know. I really think that the anxiety comes from this disintegrated part of our authentic self.
So if you can find a way to express it in a healthy way, especially through creativity, then that's what helps me. So just trust yourself and explore what you really want to explore.
Melinda: Yeah. And I'm going back to also the one you mentioned earlier, just simply saying, I am enough. How powerful that can be and what it can do to your nervous system. Just to say that and to feel that. Right?
Amanda: For sure. Yeah. Yeah.
Melinda: Yeah. Great. So if people want to connect with you or find out more about your work, what are the best ways for them to find you?
Amanda: Yeah. Thank you. So I'm currently on Instagram, my tag is @amandanbeck. And then, my website, working on that, updating that, but it's just amandabeck.net.
Melinda: Great. Great. Wonderful. Well, it's such a delight and a joy to have you on the show. Thank you so much.
Amanda: Thank you so much again for having me.
Melinda: Absolutely. It's my pleasure.
Find and connect with us on YouTube and social media under Syncreate. If you enjoy the show, please subscribe and leave us a review.
We're recording today at Record ATX Studios in Austin with Amanda joining us from Los Angeles. The podcast is produced in collaboration with Mike Osborne at 14th Street Studios. Thanks so much for being with us, and see you next time.
